Poem about growing numb to the horrors of the modern world. Written in 2018 by BW Derge, featured in PARADOX LOCKED, "Constipated Consciousness" is about the swelling of emotions that appear to have no easy outlet as we feel more helpless...
Constipated Consciousness
2018 Poem by BW Derge
Vaporizing mess alright, that’s enough of that,
Got to churn the crank for the dime on a head
Red. Left away;
It’s all the remnants of
A bullshit consciousness experiment-
I’m going to fade, you know, that’s the goal,
Fucking golden-
Grappling with a blindfold that doesn’t fit,
At some point you just got to give in
And open the eyes to see what you’ve been
Fighting and it’s the sun,
It’s always the sun-
Reality is cruel
And painful
And death deals her swift blows once more,
Furious and spiteful, faced facts
Are vengeful
Spirits to unleash an explosion
Of multitudinous pain-
-
Carabidae says don’t act in violence,
That they don’t know how to react-
But you’ve got to get a lot of people
On board,
Or else it’s as easy as pulling a trigger,
Nobody gives a shit anymore,
And it happened in our own backyard,
The shoulders were too easy to shrug
Than to invest the emotional capital capable
Of absorbing these onslaught tragedy buffets-
I’m numb to it all,
And I know that’s what
The motherfuckers want,
Either numb or violent
So they can justify the cage,
But nonviolent awareness...
They don’t know what to do
So they either let you exist or kill you-
And they find convenient ways
To pinpoint reasons for murder
Because at a certain point, it’s just sport,
We all grow numb to horror-
-
Words don’t even mean what they mean
When we subjugate all to overstimulation,
An electrocution of philosophic pondering
Lost at sea, the abscess abyss knows me well,
Stares me down like a tiger at the gazelle,
Or a hungry girl with hearts to ensnare-
Swallow it all down, existence overload is
The latest fashion trend of semantical bullshit-
The pallid plaid patterns reek of recycled
Decayed ideas no one questions
Because there’s not a care around to bother
The witless marshmallow butterfly...
-
Unplugged from the sensory steam matrices
Purporting variations of the cosmos...
A seemingly timeless beating of life and being
Emanating behind a drape of the cosmos...
There eternally a mind sits to witness
The bizarre shit plaguing every corner
Of the cosmos...
Matter vaporizes
Stellar products of incandescent hydrogen
Encapsulations- travelling millions of miles
To dilute the eye
And interpret the universe as sublime,
Sour lemons pile up in the bottom intestine
And clogging occurs;
Constipated consciousness-
Got to let it out, let loose, fall through-
The shit has got to come out
Or the bacteria will kill you-
Throw it out onto the blank canvas
Of sharpened misconstrued insinuations
Of the cosmos...
-
And let the patterns work into the math
To figure it out-
Let patience and wisdom prove themselves
Not fools to follies of greed and fear-
Let power and brute fall
To the righteous endeavor of brotherhood
And truth-
Let us make the most of our time
On this smoldering rock called Earth...
Or, you know, don’t...
-
I guess this is the reveling of the end times-
Light the last heap on fire, who gives a fuck?
It’s all destined to die in the end anyway,
Ain’t it?
Bask in the tire fire extravaganza
Of humanity lost
In a swan song paradox
Inevitably forged to carry on
For at least one more century before
The nuclear tricksters
Get the best of the fluctuating nonsense
Along with her economy demon
That somehow seized control of everything...
Even me.
by BW Derge
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Poem was originally written in 2018
